This Ain't Home

Well, here I am in Southern Cali again. It usually only happens once a year, so that isn't so bad.

It's so strange here. Or rather, I feel so strange here. When I'm driving down the freeway basking in sunlight that just doesn't scream "Christmas", I enjoy it for a little while. There's a freedom in being behind the wheel. I feel like I could go...wherever. The sun's pretty nice, too. This winter in NYC has been mild as hell, but there's nothing like wide open spaces with trees and blue sky.

But that's only for a few hours. I get sick of it pretty quickly. Oddly, I find myself with a much dirtier mouth here. It's as if I miss the grit of NY so much, I make up for it with a sailor's tongue. I can only handle so much perkiness.

There are so many teenagers here. It's like the land of silicone and teenagers. Where have all the 20/30 somethings gone? I'm not kidding. I don't think I've seen a single person my age. Granted, I was shopping (I'm soooo behind with Christmas gifties) and the mall is the denizen of the teens...but still. And no-one at all that I would be attracted to. They're all so...preppy? Or wanna-be gangsta. (Or maybe real gangsta. Who knows?)

This doesn't feel like home. I'm already so bored. I flew in last night and I've been here basically one day. It's only 6 pm and I'm ready to go to bed. There's just nothing to do. The only music venues I know are further away and not the type I'm interested in. Too "L.A.". I could go sit in a movie theatre. I could... Fuck. I really tried to think of something else to do and I couldn't think of anything. Oh holy crap, man. At least Christmas Eve and Christmas are sort of taken care of. I'm hanging out with a friend for a little bit on the 26th.... Wow.

This just really ain't home anymore.