Taking It Back

I came back from my Omega retreat feeling energized and empowered and lightened and enlightened and lovely and wonderful and glorious and sure. I wasn't completely whole or healed or fixed, but I was back in my power and feeling beautiful.

So of course that was attractive to him. He found it alluring and interesting. He was drawn to it like a (god forgive the trite cliche) moth to a flame. He was in awe of it, actually. Was in wonderment.

So of course he had to do everything in his power to destroy it.

So of course I let him.

Wait. I let him? I let him? I LET him?

How did that happen?

I'm taking it back. I'm taking it ALL back. Taking back my power. Taking back my energy. Taking back my glory glory glory. It is a sad sad human being who needs to destroy others to feel better about himself. He doesn't think he's cruel? Oh my god that is a laugh and a half. He's so unhappy...so fundamentally unhappy...so blind to that...so blind to his own inadequacies...so blind to himself. He claims he's driven to be a mirror for others, to hold up an honest look to others, but he's unable to see into the mirror and witness his own face.

Please remind me to let that poison be. Please remind me not to take that drug. Please remind me that I am better, so much better, than that.